I am confident that you will save me before I die. Help me, God, be kind to me.

Heavenly Father, hear my voice, do not close your ear to my cry for help. Do not close your ears to my screaming. Be kind to me and answer me, accept my cry, and hear my shout. You who know all hidden things, You who know all hidden things that I have hidden from childhood. Things that no one else knows, but You know it all. And these are my barriers. Have mercy on me and help me. My days here on earth are short. Put into my heart, to call out to you and to cry out to you with perfect sincerity, until you answer me.

Let me cry out to you until I hear, you say to me, Hear I am. I will cry out to You.  You are my father; you are the only one who can help me. Until you say to me, here I am. Let me give you no peace, Father let me give you no peace until you take pity on me and hear my cry. I will give you no peace, my creator I will give you no peace my father. You are a God of compassion, You are a God of kindness, and You are a God of mercy. Take pity on me and hear my voice. At this present moment, I have no real knowledge of you or even how to truly serve you.

I don’t know you and even how to truly serve you. God Almighty, ruler of the whole universe, all hidden things are revealed before you. Father you know my heart, I have misled a lot of people by my outward appearance. But you know my heart, am so far from you right now. So far, I don’t even have that awareness I serve you from the sense realm.

Lord, have mercy on me. Please I beg you. Do not take me so soon. I have not even started to purify myself I have not started to even to sanctify myself. I know that I have become so totally and utterly distanced from you. That my cries are powerless to arouse my nearness to you. I have become totally and utterly distanced from you. I even fail to give birth to wisdom. I even fail to give birth to inspiration.

I even fail to give birth to encouragement. I fail to even encourage myself in You. Even when I scream and when I shout, my prayer is closed up. Even when I scream and even when I shout my prayer is closed up. I have not even begun to cry, to cry out to You with all my strength. I have not even started I do not even know how it feels like.

Even when I say I have been crying to you I still remain with my own strength. Right now I am relying on your great mercy, on your great kindness, and on your great goodness. I put my trust in your abundant mercy and your loving kindness. I hope that you will forgive me. I have hope that you will forgive me and you will save me before I die.

I am confident that you will save me before I die. Help me, God, be kind to me. I have tried everything. The harder I try, the weaker I become and the hopelessness I become. Help me God, you are my only one. Be kind to me.

I have been hard on myself and people have been hard on me. They have been harsh on me, what they have been saying to me, what I have heard them say about me. Please, Father, be kind to me. Awaken my heart, until I feel the true intensity of pain by being far from You.

The true intensity of pain of missing You. Of not having that warm relationship with my father. Let me feel that pain, let that pain awaken in me. Because this is my only hope. Comfort has not drawn me closer to you. Father, please awaken my heart until I feel that true intensity of pain. Let me realize for the first time how totally far I am from You. Please give that realization my father, how far I am from you.

There are so many things between you and me. Hear my cry, no matter how inadequate it is. Hear my cry, in my weakness in my hopelessness. In my pain, hear my cry. I know my prayer is inadequate but you are merciful God, my sins are so many, that they have weakened the power of heaven. My sins are so many Lord, I cannot even mention them one by one. But one thing I know my sins have weakened the power of heaven.

I realize my Father, as it is written in your Holy Scriptures time to give birth has come but there is no strength to birth. We keep on birthing still babies. All the promises and all the prophesies have not come to birth because there is no more strength to give birth. You alone know all secrets.

Man can speak so many things concerning their areas, concerning their situations. You, Oh God, before all of us standing now, you know all secrets. May we all come to truly recognize you and know you at all times, in all situations with deeper understanding.

Father, we are here this far so that we may reveal your godliness in this world. We are living this far for this purpose only, not to amass earthly things. Not to amass what we have been looking at. None of those things will take us to heaven.

We are now living for one purpose, for one purpose alone to reveal Your godliness to this perishing world. Your godliness, Your godliness, Your godliness, Your godliness to this perishing world. Amen, Amen Amen.